INTERNATIONAL DISTURBED PEOPLE DAY

16JAN08. Wednesday. Where do I begin??? Another day of fun in the sun.....Not. Another Yukky Day of Rain, Mud, and Cold. Still No Cold Weather Gear. But, it's on order...Ha, Ha, Ha.

Oh, Today is International Disturbed People Day!!! Celebrate.

I don't care if you lick windows, take the special bus or occasionally pee on yourself... You hang in there sunshine, you're frickin' special.

DARWIN

15JAN08. Tuesday. Not much happening here. Cold, Rain, and Mud. Another dismal day away from the family, football, and all the things nice. Placed the Darwin Awards below for a change in latitudes and attitudes.



The 2007 Darwin Awards
Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.

Here is the glorious winner:
1. When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.

And now, the honorable mentions:

2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close He could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer...$15. ( If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed ?)

7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan , at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away. [*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]

10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake.The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.

JUST ANOTHER DAY OF FUN

15JAN08. Monday. Well, guess the packers are headed for Lambeau. Haven't really had much time to watch any games whatsoever. Also haven't had the opportunity to update the Blog. I've been busy working for several days straight. Wish I could be there to experience the joy of the packers with you guys. Good Luck

PACKERS & SEAHAWKS

11JAN08. Friday. Well, Tomorrow the Pakers vs the Seahawks. Hopefully, we'll be able to watch the game. At the time of this writing it doesn't look too good. Certainly wish them the best of luck.....Weather is getting worse here, without much relief in sight. Still, watching the local nationals work provides some interesting talking points. Safety is simply a word here. The other day, I watched a guys hanging a 12 foot fence. This feat was done while balancing on a 55-gal barrel, cot, and water cooler. All stacked to reach the top of the fence. Too Funny. Well, I digress. Good Luck Pack. Doug

ANOTHER FRIGID DAY

10JAN08. Thursday. Another Frigid Day. Boy, when the weather changes for the worst, it really changes. Temps dropped....Again. All the Mud is Freezing, Pipes are Breaking, and Cold Weather Gear is on Order. I'll probably get it in the Summer. Oh, Before I forget, I may be moving around again in the next forseeable weeks or so. I'll certainly keep you appraised where and when I can. Will Update when I can. Doug

SEVERE CLEAR....FOR A DAY OR TWO

9JAN08. Wednesday. Well, the weather has broken....for a couple of days. Just enough to get the mud out of your clothes and start again. A good Buddy of mine (Kenny) is in Iraq doing the work-movie-sleep routine (for him). The local area Scout Master sent the below joke, so don't blame me. Another day in Paridise. Will update when I Can. Doug

JOKE HERE-----
My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so she took it to the veterinarian. He found that the problem was hair in its ears. He cleaned both ears and the dog could hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell the lady that if she wanted to keep this from reoccurring she should go to the store and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month. The lady goes to the drug store and gets some "Nair" hair remover. At the register, the druggist tells her, "I f you're going to use this under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days." The lady says: "I'm not using it under my arms." The druggist says: "If you're using it on your legs don't shave for a couple of days." The lady says: "I'm not using it on my legs either; if you must know, I'm using it on my schnauzer." The druggist says: "Stay off your bicycle for a week."

HOLIDAY PICS

8JAN08. Tuesday. Well, today the Promtion Board meets. I can only hope they have all my Paperwork. Sadly, I won't know a thing until ~MAR08. Which, is a long, long, time away. Still, it's nice to know I have the Support of my Command. On a seperate note, weather is still yukky. Rain, Cold, and Mud seem to be the fundmental words of the day. The Family finally got the package I sent after my R&R in Qatar. I think they actually like the small mementos.... I've attached a couple of pictures from our Christmas here. This was during intermission of "It's a Wonderful Life"....Til Tomorrow. Doug

SCHOOL DAZE

7JAN08. Monday. Well, understand today is the day the kids go back to school. I think that's great. Although the kids simply don't agree. Especially with Exams next week or so. Shannon Got her Temp Drivers License. Understand she was able to miss all the obstacles in the neighborhood...this time. My Buddy Jim sent a Pic of himself (minus several pounds). So, if your ever in Colorado, watch out for this man!!! Still Rainy, Cold, and WINDY! Wind is really whipping around today. Knocked out some power poles, downed some tents, and flooded the French Compound. Still not much going on. All my Love Doug

DEJ'A VU

6JAN08. Sunday. Weather Same as Yesterday. Cold, Rainy, and Miserable outside. Cold - getting better. Not much going on. Blah, Blah, Blah. Same as yesterday. Did get a neat email from my buddy comparing today vs 1907. Kinda interesting reading I've attached it at the end). I guess Terri is with her Brothers watching the Playoffs and Playing Ping Pong. Man, wish I was there!!! Take Care Doug

THE YEAR 1907 One hundred years ago. What a difference a century makes!

Here are some of the U.S. Statistics for the US

Population was 87,008,000>>
The average life expectancy in the U.S. Was 47 years old.>
Only 14 percent of the homes in the U.S. Had a bathtub.>
Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone.>
A three-minute call from Denver to New York City Cost eleven dollars.>
There were only 8,000 cars in the U.S. , and only 144 miles of paved roads.>
The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 mph.>
Alabama, Mississippi, Iowa, and Tennessee were each more Heavily populated than California>
With a mere 1.4 million people, California was only the 21st>Most populous state in the Union>
The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower !>
The average wage in the U.S. Was 22 Cents per hour.>
The average U.S. Worker made between $200 and $400 per year .>
A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per year,>
A dentist made $2,500 per year,>
A veterinarian $1,500 per year,>
And a mechanical engineer about $5,000 per year.>
More than 95 percent of all births in the U.S. Took place at HOME .>
Ninety percent of all U.S. Doctors had NO COLLEGE EDUCATION
Sugar cost four cents a pound. Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen.>
Coffee was fifteen cents a pound.>
Most women only washed their hair once a month , and used Borax or egg yolks for shampoo.>
Canada passed a law that prohibited poor people from Entering into their country for any reason.>

Five leading causes of death in the U.S. Were:
1. Pneumonia and influenza>
2. Tuberculosis>
3. Diarrhea>
4. Heart disease>
5. Stroke>
The American flag had 45 stars. Arizona , Oklahoma , New Mexico , Hawaii , and Alaska hadn't been admitted to the Union yet.

The population of Las Vegas , Nevada , was only 30!!!!>
Crossword puzzles, canned beer, and ice tea Hadn't been invented yet.

There was no Mother's Day or Father's Day.

Two out of every 10 U.S. Adults couldn't read or write. Only 6 percent of all Americans had graduated from high school>

Marijuana, heroin, and morphine were all available over The counter at the local corner drugstores. Back then pharmacists said, "Heroin clears the complexion, gives buoyancy to the mind regulates the stomach and bowels, and is, in fact, a perfect guardian of health."

HAZE GREAY

5JAN08. Saturday. Another Haze Gray day here in the middle of nowhere. Rainy, cold, and Muddy. Again, with the weather, not much really going on. Finally a chance to get caught-up on all the Admin junk. And believe me, that seems to be a constant with the militay. My buddies got me hooked on the HBO Series "The Supranos." Just like the Series "Lost." I can't wait to watch it. Granted, I know it's been out for awhile. I just never got into it. Well, with this suck weather, I'm starting to get into it. Also, I'm getting good at the X-Box Games. So Ryan will have his work cut out. Actually have mastered the "Controller" Well, the guys here do give me a run for my money. Still, a skillset I thought I'd never have. Games like HALO, and CALL OF DUTY 4 are Popular here. Well, just thought I'd give you guys a quick and dirty update. Doug

OVER THE HUMP??

4JAN08. Friday. Finally!!!! I think I'm getting over this damn cold... Think I'm on Day 9 of this freaking thing.....Actually felt like hitting the gym for a quick run. Ran for about 30min to get the crud off my lungs. Weather Here SUCKS! Rainy, Cold and Muddy. So, how many Stuck-in-the-Mud HUMVEES does it take the Army to Say "Let's not go this way" Two Too Many. Still, they are fun to watch. Congrads Shannon on Passing the Florida Driver Lisence Test. Look out fellow Floridian Drivers. Again, not much happening here. Other than the Cold getting better (YEAH!). Take Care. Doug

PS Before I forget, I got some neat Christmas Cards yesterday. One from Paul & Precilla Ramsdell. And, one from Karen & Tom D. Thanks for thinking of me. Doug

WEATHER INBOUND

3JAN08. Thursday. Clouds are heavy with precipitation. Whereas today is nice and mild, I know a Weather System is fast approaching. Bringing with it Rain and Ice. More Busted Water Pipes, Increased Hazards while Driving, and I can't wait. Still have the cold. Although it feels like it's abating...Kinda. Really not much to relay today. Will update when I can. Doug

FRIGID TUNDRA OF THE DESERT

2JAN08. Wednesday. Another Great Day in the Frigid Tundra of the Desert. Have sent our request in for Cold Weather Gear and anticipate it's arrival in July. Only kidding. The stuff should be here in a few days or so. Of course, it's gonna be a big box of Stuff to lug around. The weather is actually kinda nice outside, but it won't last long. Still have a cold. However, the meds are masking its effects on the body. Still feel a little crummy. Wish I could relay lots of neat and interesting things. But, I don't have any.

THE PARTY'S OVER

1JAN08. Tuesday. Well, the Party's Over and I feel like Crap. No it isn't from a Hangover, it's this lingering Cold. I'm sure the long hours, and yukky sleep pattern don't really help. I'm certainly popping all kinds of meds, yet still feel like junk. Okay, I'm done moaning and groaning. Just got my first haircut since I've been here. I feel like a new man.....almost. My hat actually fits my head now. Beard is nice and trimmed. GQ for the War Zone. Still pretty busy, like a candle buring at both ends.... And yep, it's still cold out. Altough not too bad today, it should get down-right Frigid Tonight. Well, not much else to say. Will try to update when I can. Love To All.

Cough, Cough, Cough.....Sorry, I still have a Told.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

31DEC07. Monday. Well, Happy New Year. I can't think of a better way to spent it that here. I'm freezing my arse off. Water pipes are breaking. Heaters are not keeping up. Won't be able to get Cold Weather Gear for another week. But, who's complaining? Not Me. Happy New Year. This marks another day gone by, and accounts for another year. 2008. My goodness. Where does the Time Go? My 2008 Wishes. Kristen gets a Great Score on her SAT Exam. Shannong gets her Driving License, Ryan makes 2nd Class in Boy Scouts, and Terri has her Man Back. Happy New Year.